I saw a very beautiful girl.

Wife: Yesterday I saw a very beautiful girl.
Husband: Then what happened?
Wife: I just kept on admiring her, on and on..
Husband (gets irritated): WHAT happened then?
Wife smiled and said: I moved away from the mirror!

The man approached

The man approached the very beautiful woman in the large supermarket and asked, “You know, I’ve lost my wife here in the supermarket. Can you talk to me for a couple of minutes?” “Why?” “Because every time I talk to a a beautiful woman my wife appears out of nowhere.”

Fuming Wife..

Fuming Wife: Whats my value in the family??
Techie Husband: An Unknown Virus..!!

Ravi and his Wife Puja..

Ravi and his Wife Puja were angry with each other and were not talking to each other.
Ravi left a note on Puja's bedside table, that said: "Dear Wife! Awake me at 5 am tomorrow."
Next morning, Ravi awoke at 8 am and saw a note on his bedside table: "Dear Husband It's 5 O' Clock, get up.

A newly wed wife..

A newly wed wife talks to her husband.
Wife: Our new neighbor always kisses his wife when he goes to work, why don't you do that?
Husband: How can I? I don't even know her.

Husband: Today is..

Husband: Today is Sunday & I have to enjoy it. So I bought 3 movie tickets.
Blonde Wife: Why three?
Annoyed Husband: For you and your parents.

Wife: Honey..

Wife: Honey, if I die would you get married again?
Husband: No dear.
Wife: I'm sure you would.
Husband: Okay, I would.
Wife: Would you let her sleep in our bed?
Husband: Ya, I guess so.
Wife: Would you let her wear my clothes.
Husband: No, she is taller than you.

Wife..

Wife: (standing in front of mirror) I am fat, old, wrinkled and no longer pretty. Will you still give me a compliment?
Funny Husband: Your eyesight is still excellent !

Blonde Wife..

Blonde Wife: Sweet Heart ! When you remove your specks you look like the same cute guy whom I married 20 years back.
Husband: Yes dear, when I remove my specks, you also look like the same charming girl whom I married 20 years back.

A French husban..

A French husband was returning home after cremating his wife.
He sees heavy lightning and thunderstorm in the sky.
Husband thinks: She must have reached there.

Wife: If I clim..

Wife: If I climb Mount Everest what will you give to me.
Husband: PUSH !

Husband: I want divorce

Husband:  I want divorce. My wife hasn't spoken to me in six months.
Lawyer: Think about it once again. Wives like that  are hard to  get!

Wife: Do you love me just

Wife: Do you love me just because my father left a lot of money for me?
Husband: Not-at-all honey, I would love you no matter who left you the money.

Husband: If I die, will you remarry?

Husband: If I die, will you remarry?
Wife: No! I'll stay with my sister. But if I die will you remarry?
Husband: No, I'll also stay with your sister.

Wife:"last night..

Wife:"last night i dreamt of u buying me a diamond necklace"
Husband:"tonight, go to sleep and enjoy wearing it"

A man put a lamp on his wife

A man put a lamp on his wife head and said to her if you lied these lamp will turn on do you understand ????? She said yes ....
The lamp turned on !!!!